10 Things You Didn't Know About Stress
The 500 Things Project Ep. 21
Hi there. Today we’re talking about stress. First, two questions:
How stressful would you say the last year of your life was? Were there any events that were particularly stressful?
Would you say that on the whole stress is bad and unhealthy, or good and useful?
A group of researchers asked thousands of people these same two questions, and then eight years later they looked at public records to see who had died.
Bad news, then good news: People in the high stress group were 40% more likely to die than their peers… BUT ONLY IF they believed stress was bad for them. People who had high stress but believed it to be good and useful actually did better than people in the low stress/bad for you category.
Okay, what?!
Storytime: during the last year, I have been down a couple spirals of hopelessness. I do not believe I am inherently cut out for motherhood. My anxiety skyrockets around children. I don’t do well with loud noise and distress. I don’t know what to do and it stresses me out. So imagine the hope that sparked into flame when I learned that parenting doesn’t have to kill me. In fact, it can help me live better and longer.
I learned about this study when I heard the folks of Sweat the Technique interview Kelly McGonigal. I got my hands on Kelly’s book, The Upside of Stress, as quickly as I could and devoured it in a few days. Here are ten things I want you to know about transforming stress.
Stress is only as bad for you as you think it is, and you can change your mind.
This is a mindset effect, which is like a placebo effect but with a lifestyle level belief. A mindset effect works by changing your actions and your physiology.
If you believe stress is good and useful, you are more likely to take proactive action on your problems rather than resorting to unhealthy coping techniques.
Believing stress is good and useful transforms an unhealthy threat response into an empowering challenge response in your body.
Stress and meaning go hand in hand. Think about any important challenge you’ve overcome in your life. We know that a meaningful life is essential to thrive, so why is our default to villainize stress?
Stress can help us rise to the challenge by preparing our minds and bodies for better performance. Sweaty palms, increased heart rate, and nerves mean that you are ready for action.
Stress can help us connect with others. Oxytocin is actually a stress hormone!
Stress helps us learn and grow. Individuals with higher levels of stress hormones soon after a stressful event are more likely to process and integrate the stress in a healthy way rather than suffering from long term effects like PTSD.
These benefits don’t mean that stress is all good or that we should intentionally seek out trauma or abuse: of course not. But it does mean there is incredible hope for growth and resilience after hard experiences.
Part of the magic of a mindset effect is that you don’t have to remember learning about it for it to have a persistent effect in your life!
Think about a stressful event in your life from the past year. Can you think of a few ways that your life has been positively impacted from experiencing the stressful event? Remember, we aren’t trying to glorify trauma. Instead, look for ways stress has improved your capacity for growth, courage, or connection.
You can do this on a daily basis, too. When you find yourself in a stressful situation, ask yourself: How can this stress help me rise to the challenge, connect with someone else, or what meaning in my life is it supporting?
If you want to learn more, I cannot recommend Kelly McGonigal’s work enough. Her TED Talk is just 15 minutes, and her book is straightforward, compelling, and actionable.
What do you think about stress? Did this blow your mind too? Hit reply and let me know.
Until next week,
Love,
Amy