10 Things Saving My Life Right Now
The 500 Things Project Ep. 42
The holidays are the busiest weeks of the year for many. For us, December feels quiet but also like it is rushing by and Christmas will be here tomorrow and like I have a hundred things to do (how have I not ordered Charlie's present yet?!) Charlie is sleeping better and also starting to learn about Rules. A new writing project is brewing for next year but it doesn't have any structure. Work and life proceed apace.
In the midst of this season of chaos and calm, I'm sharing a list of what's saving my life. This is a concept made popular by the author Barbara Brown Taylor and is just what it sounds like: anything tangible, philosophical, or otherwise that is saving your right-now life. Here we go.
Dishwasher safe plates
Long story very short, we used to have non-dishwasher safe plates and silverware, and now thanks to a thrift store run we can use our magical labor saving device. This happened a couple months ago, but I'm feeling particularly grateful today as we ran the dishwasher twice and are preparing to have guests tomorrow for a late Friendsgiving.
Pilot G-2 0.5 pens
A small but lovely thing is to know one’s signature writing tool. This one is mine. In my grade school days, the Pilot G-2 2.0s were coveted (maybe this was just between me and my brother?) A couple years ago I picked up the 0.38 and liked it but found the flow could be finicky (plus, 0.38 refills are nearly impossible to find). A few months back I got 0.5 refills instead and lo, they are my scriptorial happy place.
A pair of maroon corduroys
Story time: My family went to the beach in September and one morning I found myself at a Gap outlet. Before this incident, I would drive by outlet malls at the beach and say, “Who goes to the beach to go shopping?” Answer: No one, but a tired mom in need of spoiling, with a sleeping baby and a no-swim warning may find herself doing it anyway. I found my new favorite piece of clothing: maroon corduroys in a perfectly flattering (I think so) straight cut.
Crochet group
Ok, so it's a crochet and knitting group - it's called “Sit & Stitch” and hosted weekly at my local yarn shop. I make it maybe every other week and mostly I listen to the other women chat and get a few rows done on whatever I'm working on. It's a delightful time and significantly more estrogen in one room than at home with my boys or at work with a bunch of male engineers.
Taking leftovers for lunch
Usually every month or two I fall into a different lunch rhythm: sandwiches, then salads, and back again, but lately I've been following my husband's lead and simply packing dinner leftovers. Low effort, little planning, delicious.
Taking showers
Let me tell you why this one is on the list: mostly to remind myself to keep taking them. I realize that for most people basic hygiene like showering is a no-brainer, part of their nonnegotiable routine. Somehow, for this mama - I just forget, and when I do remember, it feels like a lot of work. Plus, who wants to have wet hair in the winter? But I don't ever regret taking a shower. Far from it. I feel refreshed in more ways than one - clean in body, and I just had 15 whole minutes to myself.
Scheduling baby-free time
Speaking of time to myself: an essential part of my and my husband's weekly tag-up with each other is to decide when I am going to get baby-free time in the upcoming weekend. I try to use this time to do two things: clean the house while no one is in it, and then do nothing. Read a fiction book. Stare at the ceiling. Take a nap. Take a bath. Watch Pride & Prejudice for the 27th time. It doesn’t always happen but it’s a game changer when it does.
Going to bed early
I always thought I was decently old woman-ish in my bedtime tendencies until I re-met my husband in his 20s. I'm writing this post at 8:15PM; he's been asleep for half an hour. In any case, following his lead and going to bed early has been more than vital to getting adequate sleep with a toddler who has yet to figure out the full meaning of “sleeping through the night.”
Eating real breakfast (and recently, drinking coffee)
This has also been true for about a year, but every so often I forget it and try to make it on a slice of peanut butter toast and have major regrets by 8AM. Currently breakfast is two eggs, bacon, and cheddar cheese on an English muffin, and a cup of coffee with heavy cream. The coffee is new - I used to be too sensitive to caffeine but now I am acclimated and on the morning joe train with no signs of disembarking.
Catching up
Last week, an out-of-town friend called me who I hadn’t heard from directly in months. We talked for almost an hour and a half and probably could have gone longer if I didn't have a Thanksgiving dinner to get to. It was refreshing, encouraging, and life-giving to hear from her. Tomorrow, we are having a last minute Friendsgiving of sorts with more friends we don't see often and I am looking forward to it. In the swirl of holiday plans, Christmas shopping, toddler raising, and endless commuting, my soul is aching for my useless friends1.
I hope you also are enjoying your people this season, and that you take a moment to think about what is saving your own life these days.
Love,
Amy
Friendships matter too. The loneliest people have plenty of deal friends, but no real friends. Deal friends are useful. Your real friends are useless—beautifully useless. - Arthur Brooks in his new book Build the Life You Want
It’s me. I’m the person who shops at the beach.